0 expectation

the 1st long video chat after that, felt calm;
have officially quit spanish since then;
actually not even in a nearby city

(4:47 a.m.)

don't blame me

would show my care in the same way u did,
but a principle is a principle,
"do i have to beg you to talk to me",
i don't know what u think,
u don't know how painful i feel,
could be cruel, and expect nothing,
you're in the circle now, so i want to share everything, sure we're different individuals,
probably not that difficult to hate u, simply recalling the sad moments;

maybe i'm romantic, if insecurity is the problem, i'm not the one to be worried,
and i could possibly be fooled by the naive request;

met in the right time.

(10:47 p.m.)

vamos a practicar?

he dicho hace 2 días; le echo de menos;
no estoy suficientemente genial;
pensé que no podría conseguir/llegar hasta agosto

(10:49 p.m.)

bs

either on purpose or not,
try to annoy him in a certain way;
he will leave sooner or later;
have been "following my heart",
but often feel sad and disappointed

(00:17 a.m.)

not masculine

he looked lonely n i felt sad, wanted to be there n warmed him, was shy n like a kid before him, said something opposite to his compliments as usual, he observed pretty well, didn't expect he'd reply "i'm waiting for you!" when asked about Edinburgh, also surprised to c he didn't shave, found it cute when he messed with his hair, he lay in the couch as if pretending i was there

(9:22 p.m.)

es posible

"quien bien te quiere te hará llorar."

(10:53 p.m.)

forbidden words

what if;
as you wish

(11:10 p.m.)

du bist frei

too much tear, tho it's not directly his fault, thought "i'm tired", another cliche. he's probably been trying already, but it's not enough for me.
i want sb. who can be much more available. no way for me to show more "kindness" in such situation.
reasons i must not give up now: to be against the horoscope forecasts, his nephew.

(00:11 a.m.)

head in the clouds

since last friday, have enough happiness, no problem that he didn't msg

(11:19 p.m.)

argue

my assumptions (mad/not interested/busy) due to being insecure n needy?

don't be "considerate"

(10:22 p.m.)

the very requirement

constant contacts

(10:35 p.m)

brake

cliche: tired of waiting;
suppose im not mad about that he made it clear, instead, it's obvious that he didn't wanna talk more;
i see how we might end even if he wants to be serious;
as usual, i want to win, n now im trying to care less;
gracias/gracies

(10:03 p.m.)

inevitable?

repeating

(10:41 p.m.)

naturally

all the actions when one enjoys

(00:40 a.m.)

think. think

the feeling of being rejected,
it seems that i started to open up but that's not appreciated,
found more cruel moments,
but maybe i'm selfish too,
don't want to pretend, yet the attempt of communication is v likely to fail

(8:10 p.m.)